Monday 12 November 2012

...Cambodia Calling 7 - Goodbye's are Never Easy.

As the title suggest this is going to be a merry little slinger. This week has had its middles, lows and very lows. Don't worry folks, it's not that serious and no I won't harm myself.

So I'm sick - again. A round of applause for my immune system it's doing a bang up job of keeping the lurgy away. I only have one question for this defunct body of mine and that is why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Do I not care for you? Love you as if you were my own? Treat you with love, kindness and compassion? I give you food, water, rum, what more do you need?! Please tell me because it seems like I am missing the point that you are trying to make to me. Do you need more rum? Is that the problem? Ok maybe that was more then one question, but once you start asking the ball just keeps rolling. What can I say, I'm a detective, remember?

"Rachel Roots" - that could be the name of my detective agency. It implies hard work, determination and no fear of getting dirty. Like really, really dirty. Prepared to jump into those big rubbish bins just to find evidence and shit. No actually shit but you know if I'm in a rubbish bin the chances are there is going to be some shit. Hopefully it's tied up in a bag. 

Gone off point! As usual, I should stop trying to mould this process and just let you read a random collection of my thoughts. I did that once, it's titled "Consciousness" and you can find it nestled in between the stories on this here blog. (Nothing like a good bit of self promotion eh?)

So I bought these tissues from a random pharmacy and (typically) I was over charged. That's not the worst part, I'm use to being charged double and 9/10 times I argue the point but I was in no position to argue this time. My nose was running and she was clearly in the whole "supply and demand" mindset, so I forked over my dollar for 2 tiny packets of tissues (it's extortion, in the supermarket it's 70 cents...) and they smell like aftershave. Men's aftershave. Now I'm all for a good smelling man but I really don't want to blow my nose with one. It's like my nose has been assaulted by a teenage boy who was giving a bottle of Joop for his birthday and now thinks he's Hugh Hefner. Not cool. (If you weren't following that whole "tissues smelling like aftershave" is the worst part). She's probably been trying to shift them for a year and no Cambodian wants to take them and then I rock up and she's like "bingo!" and thus the tale unfolds and I walk away with my nose smelling like I should be called Jack, sitting in my local, sipping on a WKD cos I think it's cool.

Blew up that point didn't I?

Well I guess that was the low and the middle is to follow.

My back got better (wooooooo!!!!) and then I got sick. End of story. That was the middle, I hope it blew your minds, I know it was super fantastic.

So the very low. *sigh*.

Today I said goodbye to Charlotte and yeah I know it's not like a proper goodbye and it's just an "I'll see you soon." But nevertheless it reduce me to a teary, snotty wreck, standing in the middle of the road, bawling like a baby. I'm just a glass cage of emotion right now. I blame the flu and the looming onset of my period (that always does strange things to my hormonal system). I'm gonna miss her though, I'm gonna miss her so much. It was such a pleasure getting to know her and we had such crazy, fantastic times that will linger in my memory long after the haze of Cambodia dies down. She is a fantastic person. There are no other words to describe her (ok the words insane, bad influence, ginger, amazing and all round brilliant spring to mind but come on now, we will just stick to fantastic).  So before I start snotting all over the place I will just say this: I have learnt here that experiences that are life changing bring you closer together, especially if you are experiencing those things together. It shows people's true colours and brings to light the sides of yourself that you try to hide. Charlotte let all those sides hang loose and never compromised on what she believed in and who she was. That is something truly amazing and shows an incredibly strong sense of character. It is something I am beginning to learn to do for myself, so I say thank you. Thank you for showing me that I do not need to compromise on who I am, your the bees knees innit? I hope she gets home safely and that the cold isn't too much of a shock to the system! Goodbye for now Bad Influence Charlotte, big love you get me? I don't think it helps that I have Avril bloody Lavigne playing round and round in my head. No Avril I don't want to keep hanging on, leave me alone and go bother someone else.

The next one to say goodbye to is Phavy but I'm not thinking about that right now. I have a whole week to prepare myself.

So I'm going to end it there and crawl into the disease hole that is now my room and try sleep off this fever. Finger's crossed I'll feel better come the morning and if not then I'll just chew on a few more paracetamols.


Big Ocean crossing love ya'll!


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