...And Where Are You Now?

As always I start these posts harping on about how long it's been since I've posted anything and blah blah blah. I won't do that today, you and I both know my excuses fall flat, so to cut a long story short, I've been incredibly busy saving the world and thinking up terribly important world saving techniques that could err save humanity...

Now that that unpleasantness is out the way we can get down to the nitty gritty, the real stuff, the topics that actually matter. 

"But Rachel" I hear you murmur "What about your story challenge? How far did you get? Where, oh where are these promised chapters?"

*sigh*

In answer to your above questions I haven't finished said story - or stories, as I started writing one then realised I had no idea where it was indeed heading, so gave up on it and started another one afresh and then the same process repeated it self and the outcome is very much the same.

So I decided to ask an old friend for help.

We hadn't seen each other in almost a year but I can count on him being honest about what he really thinks when it comes down to my writing. So I explained what both stories were about and he (thankfully) is keen to read them both and give me some feedback (what a saint). Whilst discussing the various states I'd left my characters in, said friend paused the conversation and asked "Rach, why are all your characters either waking up or falling asleep?"

Well this threw me. I had no idea that's what I've been doing, especially concerning the last couple of stories I'd written (and he's read) so I told him so. He responded "it's not a criticism, it's interesting, something to think about". And so I thought. I sipped my pint and I thought.

"Well" says I "I guess when I write, I'm always aware of the reader, I want to give the reader a rounded sense of my character and what that character does from the moment they wake up to the moment they go to bed or (as it is in most cases) pass out." I paused. I sipped my pint. "So how do I stop doing that?"

"Why should you stop?" said he "think of it as a process, write everything you want to write and then edit and edit and edit and edit until you've done so much editing there is nothing that can be changed - of course there is always something that can be changed but edit to the point where you can physically see nothing else to change and all those little bits will naturally fall away". Sound advice.

That dear cyber friends is what I plan to do - after I've finished thinking up a thousand different ways to save humanity from itself. I will then and only then post the first chapter of each story and let you have a read and tell me what you think of it. What you honestly think of it, I promise I won't sulk if you hate it...you may just be edited out of my life saving humanitarian plan, that's all.

But that leads me to another point, editing and friendships. When do you know if it's time to edit a friendship or in some cases completely delete a friendship?

I get a few people from previous school days adding me on Facebook - still not quite sure how they find me as my profile is private but hey! The beauty of Facebook. Most recently I've had someone add me who I haven't spoken to in well, 8 years I think and I just thought, why? What do we possibly have to talk about now? We were close friends then but not now. Now it would just be awkward reminiscing about days gone by and frankly I just don't have the time or the energy to even want to. Is that mean? I feel like I HAVE to because we WERE friends. I feel guilty for ignoring the reminders that so and so added me and is still waiting for a response.

But then I get to thinking, do you truly want to reconnect and start up a deep and meaningful friendship again or did I pop into your head one day and you thought "Oh, I wonder what her life's like now, I know, I'll check Facebook, the stalkers yellow pages and see if I can snoop around her photos." But damn, private profile! "Oh well" you think, squatting behind your computer screen "I'll just add her, she'll say yes because everyone likes having lots of Facebook friends". ERRRR wrong you are there matey.

Needless to say I haven't added this person and needless to say I'm probably thinking about this far too much and devoting a lot of time to this thought process, a lot more then said person thought when they clicked the "add friend" button. But my profile's private for a reason. It's a gateway into my life, into the lives of the people that I care about and I have the right to say yes or no to people when they ask to be let inside. You wouldn't let a stranger on the street come home with you just because they asked so why do it online? I'm probably coming across as a self absorbed arse wipe and those who genuinely know me know that to be true sometimes but mostly I just over think everything. Absolutely every tiny insignificant thing.

I'm over thinking this post right now.

I'm worried it's not coherent enough. That it doesn't make any sense, that I haven't used enough commas, that I've used too many commas, or God forbid, that it's BORING.

It's probably the reason why I write about every detail of my characters lives because I think it's important you know EVERY TINY DETAIL about them.

*Hyperventilates"

But why should I care? Why? It's my blog, I'll do what I damn well please thank you! Hahahahaha.

(Please don't hate me).

And on that slightly weird tone I shall leave you, I feel like I'm headed in a odd direction and it's probably best to take myself of my blog and stop mind splurging all over your screens and do something productive with the rest of my night. Like maybe, edit?

Ha!

Here's hoping.